All Words Lead to You
by Hellfire Pheonix
Summary: In a new world without walls and titans, Rivaille makes a living as a popular novelist. Retelling the stories of his former life, the author hopes that one day, if and when Eren reads them, it will help him regain their lost memories together. RiRen
1. Memoria

_One on the right… Two on the left," The corporal observed as he darted his eyes slowly from left to right. Like monstrous beings, the titans trudged forward, dragging their feet and grinning manically at the sight of human flesh and blood. His fingers tightened over the triggers of his blades; he'd kill them all._

_"Corporal!" A voice called out behind him. "I've gathered the reinforcements!"_

_Turning towards her swiftly, the dark haired man responded. "Pisteuo, look after that soldier down there. The rest of you attack the one on the right." Pivoting on his foot, Alae returned his attention back to the titans. "I'll clean up the ones on the left." Ignoring Pisteuo's cry, he released the gas on his 3D maneuver gear and shot his grappling hooks to a nearby building. Flying through the air, Alae's face was passive. "What a lovely bunch," he commented, his eyes never betraying his feelings. He landed nimbly on top of a roofed building and began walking briskly towards the titans. At the sight of him, they immediately opened wide, teeth baring back behind their lips._

"Ah, amazing as always, sir!" Petra remarked as she shuffled through the papers of his manuscript. She smiled as she quickly skimmed over the latest chapter of his novel, overjoyed at him finishing his work without her having to hassle him. His novel was certainly getting interesting, that's for sure. "You're right on top of your deadlines for the week!" She exclaimed, a radiant and happy expression on her face.

From his position behind the wooden desk, Rivaille simply nodded. Twiddling the cigarette loosely between his lips, he accepted her compliments loosely. Watching her intently as she began to ramble about his schedule for the day, the dark haired man felt his heart clench slightly. In a previous life, she had been just like this – happy, smiling, genuine, caring; Rivaille had always cherished her devotion to him. They had been squad mates; he trusted her just as she did him. They had worked together for years alongside Auruo, Gunter, and Erd. Like him, they had all been given a second chance at life in a world without titans or walls. In this life, he was a popular novelist; his books painted with the blood of his memories. And in this life, they were his loyal team of editors, making sure his memories were printed for all to read. They had all been given the chance to be together again and truth be told, he'd be lying if he said he wasn't grateful for that. When she reached up to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear, he saw a flash of red on her face. 'But she doesn't remember,' Rivaille thought to himself, 'none of them do.'

He wasn't born blind to the memories of his past like the others, no, he remembered it all. Every single death, every single triumph, Rivaille shouldered the memories all on his own. And because he was the only one who remembered humanity's fight against the titans, the dark haired man decided then and there that he would write. He would document everything that he remembered; to honor all those that perished during the titan's reign. He would honor the Scouting Legion, the Stationary Guard, and the Military Police. He would honor the training recruits, the citizens, and the people within the districts. He would honor all those memories in his books – that way, to him, it would've meant that they too had been alive.

"Boss," Auruo called out as he poked his head into Rivaille's office, "Erd and I are running down to the printing company in a few; do you need us for anything else or are we done for the day?" Beside him, Petra frowned, shoving him lightly with her shoulder before ridiculing him for being so quick to leave work. "Oi, oi, oi!" The blond replied back, stepping away from her offending shoulder. "I promised my brothers and sisters that I'd take them for dinner today!" Clicking his tongue in mock annoyance, for he would never speak negatively to Petra, he returned his attention back to Rivaille. "Sir?"

"Yes, you can leave after that," Rivaille replied back before he took a deep drag of his cigarette. Turning his face slightly, he exhaled away from his two editors, not wanting the smoke to bother them. "Anything else? If not, I'll be getting back to work." While it true that he had overcome his deadlines for the week, he had never been one to sit idly. There was always work to be done, that part of him hadn't changed. As he moved to place his hands back on the plastic keyboard, another voice thundered from the hallway.

"Erwin and Hanji called earlier!" Erd's voice shouted from outside Rivaille's opened door. "They want to know if you'd like to go drinking with them today!"

Rivaille simply shook his head, allowing Petra and Auruo to relay his message to Erd. Tuning out their voices as background noise, he watched from the corner of his black-rimmed glasses as they left his office, laughing about something. His door shut behind them and after a few minutes, Rivaille sat back in his leather office chair, allowing his bangs to fall before his eyes. Reaching up to remove his glasses, he placed them gently on his desk. Running a hand through his hair, Rivaille sighed, taking a moment to reflect on his new life. He had gone to the best schools around and graduated at the top of his class. He owned a luxurious penthouse condo twenty minutes away that overlooked the modern city ironically named Sina. He was a novelist with fans all over the world. His number one seller, Attack on Titan, was loved and admired by millions. While they took delight in his stories, finding them thrilling and exciting, they were ignorant of how horrifying his adventures really were. But, that was to be expected. How could they have known the fear of seeing the man-eating titans with their own eyes? How could they have known lost, especially when it happened all around you and all the time? He found salvation in his writing, considering it a doorway to his former life. Not much was known about his personal life and to be honest, Rivaille liked to keep it that way. He didn't like his fans knowing about the things he liked or the things he didn't like – he was content with just being a mystery. It was the same in his previous life as a member of the Survey Corps; only his close friends and comrades knew of his true self. He rarely attended book signings or parties his publishing company threw for him. He liked to honor his memories in private, up on top of the roof of his suite, while he sipped a cup of tea. His writing style was known for being incredibly detailed, dedicated, and clean. With every novel he released, he titled each and every introductory page as "For the Hunter", but as always, when asked, Rivaille never spoke of who this person was.

Shifting slightly, he settled more comfortably in his chair. Rivaille thought of Hanji and Erwin, his fellow squad leaders who had also been reborn. Like the others, they too had been born free, free of the memories and free of the burdens of their past. Hanji was a forensic anthropologist that specialized in the biology and anatomy of the human body while Erwin was the leading President and CEO of Sina's top business firm. Rivaille was very fortunate to have them in this life by his side once again; he was glad that they had a chance to live anew. 'Anew, huh?' He mused, placing his elbow on the arm of his chair and resting his cheek against a closed fist. 'I wonder if you too have reborn anew…' Rivaille thought lastly as a small, almost unnoticeable smile laced his lips. 'I wonder, if you're alive right now, what are you up to?'

* * *

"Oi, Eren!" Jean called, holding an opened hand to his mouth as a pair of green-turquoise eyes turned towards him. Nudging him over with his head, the taller boy waited until Eren made his way over to him. "The others are up on the roof waiting, you ready?" Watching as Eren patted himself down real quick, Jean nodded back once Eren flashed him a quick grin. As the two mounted the stairs up to the roof of their high school, Jean couldn't help but look over his shoulder a couple of times. "… Is Mikasa not coming?"

Chuckling a little under his breath, Eren dodged Jean's attempt at shoving him lightly. "She's still in the locker rooms I think. She's probably waiting for Annie." As the two made their way up the stairs, it was actually Armin who opened the doors to let them outside. Allowing the breeze to ruffle his brown locks, Eren sighed out comfortably. Tuning out Jean and Armin's conversation as background noise, Eren looked on ahead at the group of kids hanging out together at the north-most point of the roof. Excluding Annie and Mikasa of course, everyone was there eating their lunch.

They had all grew up together in the city of Maria and had never been apart. He, Mikasa, and Armin had been a threesome for as long as he could remember with the same for Annie, Reiner, and Bertholdt. They had all been childhood friends before meeting together as a whole in elementary school. Sasha, Connie, Marco, and Jean all knew each other through their parents while Historia, commonly known as "Christa" and Ymir came into the picture during their last year of elementary school. They were all best friends – there was just something that seemed to bind them all together.

"Eren! Where's Mikasa?" Sasha asked before taking a large bite of her sandwich. Beside her, Connie grinned and reached for her bag of chips. She swatted him away with her free hand but poured some for him anyway. Before Eren could give her the same answer he gave Jean, the doors opened once again only to reveal Annie and Mikasa walking together side by side.

"Sorry we're late," Annie said, her voice coming out slightly bored. "Mikasa was waiting for me." As the two best friends went their separate ways with Annie retreating to sit in between Reiner and Bertholdt and Mikasa going over to Armin and Eren, Sasha whistled loudly.

"The gang's all here!" She announced happily as the others gladly pulled out their lunches. Some would trade with others while others would share, but all in all, they ate together as friends usually did. As they traded witty banter and teasing conversations, time went on till they were all finished with their lunches. Gathering in a large circle, the twelve friends all placed their schedules in the middle for everyone to see. They all wanted to see if they shared any classes together.

"Christa and I have math together after this!" Ymir cried out, throwing an arm over Christa's shoulders and nuzzling her cheek against that of her best friend's. The blond simply rolled her eyes teasingly before swatting Ymir's arm away. Grinning at her lady love's response to her teasing, Ymir ruffled her hair. "Anyone have language afterwards?" The brunette asked.

"I do," Connie groaned out, rubbing the back of his head.

"I'm pretty sure I do too," Armin replied back.

Eren read through their schedules quickly, his eyes sweeping from left to right, before he reached over and placed a hand on his sister's shoulder. "Looks like we have science together again." She flashed him a relieved smile before pointing at Reiner, Bertholdt, and Sasha's schedules. "Oh wow, looks like we'll all be in science together!"

Marco flashed everyone a radiant smile as he chucked a thumb over at Jean, "We've got fine arts together too!"

As the twelve of them kept comparing schedules, Eren allowed himself to look away, if only for a brief moment. Turning his attention to the sky, he watched as a flock of birds flew in the direction of the breeze. 'That's weird…' He thought as a frown laced his lips. For some reason, a feeling of drive and motivation coursed them, invigorating his body and pumping adrenaline through his veins. His eyes traced along the feathers of their wings, causing him to subconsciously touch a fist to the left side of his chest. 'What is this feeling of wanting to be free?' He blinked once, twice, and then a third time, completely lost in thought. In his state of disorientation, he failed to notice his right hand coming closer and closer to his mouth when –

"Eren!" Armin cried, snapping Eren out of his trance-like state. "What are you doing?!"

"… What?" Eren asked back, his words coming out slightly muffled.

"Your hand, Eren, look!"

Peering down at his right hand, he was shocked to see just how close his hand was to his mouth. He was even more shocked to see that his mouth was placed right over his thumb, his teeth barely grazing the skin. For some reason, he just wanted to bite it a little… not enough to break the skin of course. As the others fell silent at Eren's strange actions, Eren felt awkward having their eyes on him. Mikasa halted in her conversation with Sasha at the sound of Armin's cry but it wasn't until she turned around fully that she rushed over to Eren, grabbing his hand and holding in her own as she inspected it. "What were you thinking?" She admonished incredulously, her big sister persona overtaking her. "You could have hurt yourself! You've would bit your birth mark too!"

Looking down at his hand in hers, Eren frowned. Oh right, his birth mark. It was located at the base of his thumb in between it and the side of his wrist. It was dark, as if it was bruised, with rimed edges along the top of his hand. It didn't ever hurt, but for some reason, it seemed to ache today. As she rubbed the almost abused skin with her soft fingers, the brunet looked away. "Sorry, I don't know what came over me." Before Mikasa could reply back, the lunch bell sounded, signaling the end of their lunch period. The twelve friends cleaned up and gathered their things together before tapping Eren on the shoulder or hugging his side to make sure he was okay. He accepted their concern kindly, waving it off as him just zoning out, but in the back of his mind, he was utterly confused. 'I really wanted to bite my hand for some reason.' He wasn't at all sure what this meant, but Eren had a feeling that he needed to be more careful from now on.

* * *

Author's Notes: I was a little hesitant to post this here because I've been making the move over to A03 but I thought it'd be good to do so anyway since I started with ff.n - Please read, review, follow, fave, and all that jazz if you enjoyed it!


	2. Dreams

"Armin! Are you ready to go?" Eren asked, knocking the back of his knuckles against the wooden door to his best friend's bedroom. His delicate hurting picked up the thumping of footsteps as well as the overturning of furniture and he immediately took a step back, making room for Armin who would probably come bursting through the door at any second. '3…2…1' He mentally counted down and as if right on cue, the door was thrown open and Armin stood right in the middle of the doorframe with a duffel bag tossed over his shoulder.

"I'm ready!" The blond replied back breathlessly as he rose up to meet Eren and Mikasa's gaze. Giving them a quick grin, he nodded. "Let's get going! Are we walking or driving to Christa's?" For the past few years, ever since they entered high school anyway, it became a bit of norm to spend the night at Christa's with everyone. Her parents frequently left on business trips so the big house was open for such things and to be truthful, Christa rather liked having everyone stay with her on the weekends. It certainly made the large house a little less lonely.

Mikasa shifted her own duffel bag as she nudged her head in direction of the front door. "I thought it'd be a good idea to walk today. With the weather the way it is, it'd be rude not to. We should probably get going." Both Armin and Eren nodded at that, agreeing that they should get a move on. Although it was true that the twelve of them lived within relatively close proximity of each other, Christa's house in particular was located somewhat apart from everyone else's. She belonged to a wealthy family and resided on the western side of Maria because of it. The three friends walked side by side and shoulder to shoulder with Eren walking in between Armin and Mikasa.

Turning to grin at Armin and then at his sister, the brunet recounted the events of his day at school. "You should have seen Connie today," Eren began, "He was screwing around with Sasha again during math and Shadis was not having any of that!" He then stifled a laugh, his shoulders shaking a bit, before ultimately continuing. "He grabbed his stapler and just like launched it right at Connie's head! He's got the biggest bruise ever and a whole week's worth of cleaning duties after school!"

"And Sasha?"

"She's got cleaning duties too but only for half the week."

The raven haired teen hummed thoughtfully. "Seems like they both got off easy this time." The three childhood friends conversed more as they walked and the topic of interest shifted to Armin's day at school. By then, nearly half an hour had passed and Armin, Eren, and Mikasa eventually made it to the intersection that marked the district line between central and western Maria. Upon crossing it, they'd only be a block away from Christa's house. Walking together, they passed by the park near when –

"…Ah!" The blond uttered out a cry as he suddenly found himself falling forward only to held back by the scruff of his shirt by Mikasa. Reacting quickly, she had managed to save him from planting face first into the stony pavement. Armin placed a hand on the ground to steady himself and pushed himself back upwards into a standing position, his eyes searching for the offending object that nearly tripped him off his feet. "What was that?"

"Are you hurt at all, Armin?" Mikasa asked as she raked her eyes along his frame for any scratches. He replied back that he was fine and thanked her thusly, smiling a little at her saving him yet again. The raven haired teen always had a knack for helping him and Eren.

Beside him, Eren had crouched down, his fingers grasping over the straight edges of the item. Picking it up numbly, he inspect it slightly before turning it over. "It's a book." His eyes read from left to right at the white words that littered the cover, "Attack on Titan by Levi." Oh, it was that book everyone had been talking about. What was it doing here? He took notice of the cover art; a young male duel-wielding a pair of swords, a wall, and a mysterious humanoid creature at the very top of it that overlooked the wall. Eren studied it briefly for a couple of seconds before handing the book to Armin for the younger teen to see.

"Someone must have left it here by accident," Armin said, deducing it quickly. Like Eren, he took a good look at the book cover for a couple of minutes. It felt heavy in his hands, almost as if the weight of the words inside was too much for the paperback to handle. Opening it, he flipped through the pages, his eyes skimming the words from left to right. "It's a little odd that someone would forget they misplaced this. This book is a bestseller, I'm surprised someone forgot it so blindly." Shutting the book closed, Armin dusted it off quickly before nodding his head back at Eren and Mikasa. "Until we can find the owner, I'll hold onto it."

Just as the three of them began getting ready to walk the last block to Christa's house, a loud honk sounded from beside them. They all turned in the direction it came from swiftly and were met with the sight of a very familiar four door pick-up truck. The window rolled down to reveal Reiner who rested his left arm on the windowsill. "Need a ride?" His voice was rough but the slight smirk on his face showed his enthusiasm at seeing them.

"It's only a block more?" Eren asked back with a row of his eyes. He did however take the older blond up on his offer. Nudging Armin and Mikasa forward, they all walked towards the trunk of Reiner's truck. They each threw their respective duffel bags into the bag right next to that of Annie, Bertholdt, and Reiner's before returning back to the side of the car. He opened the door and climbed in to sit right beside Annie who simply nodded in greeting.

Bertholdt, who had been sitting in the passenger's seat beside Reiner, smiled apologetically as he looked over his shoulder. "Sorry that it's a bit cramped in the back." Armin waved it off easily, settling into his seat with a smile. While it was true that he, Eren, Mikasa, and Annie were all rather squished and pressed up uncomfortably next to each other, he wasn't one to badmouth a kind gesture.

Annie hummed in response, "It'd be even worse if you were sitting here."

"That's for sure," Reiner agreed with a laugh before speeding off to Christa's. He wasn't a particularly fast driver but then again, he wasn't particularly slow either. They safely made it to Christa's rather large estate and opted to park in her large garage, spying another set of cars that most likely belonged to Marco, Ymir and Sasha. After assembling their bags, Bertholdt, Armin, Annie, Reiner, Mikasa, and Eren all made their way to the front door with Armin knocking on the front door.

It was thrown open a few minutes later by Christa who smiled brightly at the sight of all of them. "Hi everyone!" She chimed, her voice practically ringing like begs. "I'm so glad you all could make it! Come in, come in!" She stepped gracefully to the side and motioned to the living room that was located to their right. "Ymir, Jean, Marco, Connie, and Sasha are already inside." The seven of them walked to said room only to see Connie rubbing the bruise on his forehead with Sasha laughing beside him; he was probably in the process of telling everyone what happened.

"… I can't believe how good he is!" Connie cried out with a sigh. "I swear, his back was turned and everything but he still knew I wasn't paying attention." He shook his head once more before turning his attention to the newcomers with everyone else doing the same. "Oh hey guys," he started, "good to you all could make it!"

They all chorused in with their hellos as Christa floated back over to the couch to sit with Ymir while Mikasa made herself comfortable on the floor beside Sasha. Armin and Eren opted to lay on the floor over where Marco and Jean were and Annie chose to sit next to Ymir's legs against the couch with Reiner and Bertholdt shadowing her sides. The twelve friends all chatted and conversed for an hour or two before Sasha ultimately couldn't take it anymore and thusly prompted that it was time for dinner. Marco had the great idea of ordering in pizza and while the brunette hated waiting even longer for food, the reward was certainly worth it. They all hungrily ate, trading a series of witty banter and laughing together, and before of them knew it, it was already well into the night at around 10:30 or so. Armin, Jean, Sasha, Christa, Marco, Reiner, Connie, Bertholdt, Annie, Mikasa, Eren, and Ymir moved from the living room and settled into the blond's rather huge bedroom. Soon, there were sleeping bags and sheets thrown all over the floor and while Christa herself had a rather large four-poster bed located at the northern side of the room, she chose to sleep with everyone else on the floor.

"You know Armin," Jean called, "I've been meaning to ask you, but what's that book you've been holding?" He pointed a thin finger at the book Armin had been clutching to his chest for the past few hours, his curiosity having finally gone over the brink. The boy in question looked down at this chest and pulled the book out for everyone to see, showing everyone the cover. "Attack on Titan? I didn't know you were into books like that." To his knowledge, Jean had known Armin to be a lover of books about marine life, overall geography, and things of that nature. He had no idea Armin was into science-fiction or novels about death and adventure.

"Oh, I'm not really," Armin replied, "Eren, Mikasa, and I found it on our way over here." Like before, he opened it and began flipping through the pages. "I'm sure it's a good book though, I mean, it's still number one on the charts after what, three years? And it's just the first one in its series."

Cupping her face in her hands, Sasha blinked. "Why don't you just read to us now?" Beside her, Connie readily agreed – Armin had always been a great storyteller.

"I couldn't!" He laughed.

"Oh come on, Armin." Eren supplied as he grinned at his best friend. "Just do the first chapter. That should be good." Once again, the young blond shook his head but it wasn't until everyone else starting rooting him that he finally gave in with a sigh. Armin smiled a little sheepishly as he turned to the first page, his right thumb and forefinger already poised and ready to turn the page for when he needed to. Around him, everyone huddled together comfortably, ready for Armin's grand storytelling.

He took a deep breath before reading softly, his eyes moving from left to right, "The day progressed normally as it usually did. People talked and flocked about, conversations coming out in laughs and genuine words. But, as always, things were never that simple. When lightning streaked across the sky and smoke puffed about, their days certainly became numbered as a looming shadow formed around them. The shadow rose higher and higher until a face so humanoid yet unnatural at the same time, was peaking over the fifty meter tall wall that encompassed them all. Steam and more smoke formed around it as it looked down on the citizens of Shiganshina. That day, humanity remembered the terror of being ruled by them. The humiliation of being kept in a cage…"

* * *

**Pain.**

**That's the first thing Eren felt as he suddenly found himself being kicked in the face. The force of the blow was enormous, enough so that he felt his right cheek immediately beginning to bruise. His mouth burned at the immediate contact and he could practically taste the metallic flavor of blood in his mouth that resulted because of it. In the distance, he could hear the click of his tooth as it colliding with the ground. 'Huh?' Eren thought confusingly. Turning around but finding it ultimately difficult to really move due to the handcuffs around his wrists, he turned back to face his attacker when he felt another swift blow to his abdomen. Blood splattered in the air as he cried out in obvious discomfort, his muscles straining under the harsh beating.**

**His green eyes were barely able to make out the silhouette of a man before he felt fingers firmly grasping his hair and pulling his face up to meet his. He saw a glimpse of short black hair, the kind that was shaved in an undercut. Eren couldn't make out a face but he didn't have any time to really study him for his attacker swung his leg back and slammed a knee against the side of his face again. One, two, three, four, five, six, and seven – that's how many times Eren got kicked and as he hunched down low to the floor, breathing heavily with blood trailing down his mouth and nose, he found himself being slammed to the ground once again by the man's foot. God, it hurt so much. What he had done to deserve this? Was he going to die?**

"…!" Eren uttered a sharp gasp as his eyes immediately flew open, the nightmare having shocked him awake. He was breathing heavily and nearly panting, his chest rising and falling at an alarm rate. It took a bit for his eyes to adjust but he was able to make out that he was looking at the ceiling of Christa's room. He sat up and brought a shaking hand to his face, feeling for the blood he thought was there. As the pads of his fingers ran along his face, he was relieved that there was none. Still, he was restless. 'What was that?' He thought, holding his right palm to calm his right eye as he fisted his hair. 'Who was that guy?'

Eren was scared, very much so in fact. He had never felt such excruciating pain before; that dream felt so real and that was terrifying. Who was that man? Why was he beating him? To his knowledge, Eren had never seen that man before in his whole life. He wasn't sure what he had done to deserve a nightmare like that but he definitely did not want to see that man ever again. Stifling another cry, he took a look around at his friends who were all still sleeping soundly, thinking back to the events that occurred before they all went to bed.

Not long after Armin finished reading the first chapter, everyone had urged him to continue. Things were just beginning to get interesting however, it was practically midnight by the time he stopped. The blond was able to get the first couple of chapters down before everyone eventually starting dropping one by one until he himself fell asleep as well. Eren's eyes raked along the slumbering bodies around him, taking note of everyone. They were all huddled within relatively close proximity of each other with him in between Mikasa and Armin.

Mikasa was sleeping soundly on his right with her long hair spilled out behind her. She was on her left side with her arm tucked underneath her pillow. Armin on the other hand was sleeping on his right side with his blanket pulled over so only his blond head was seen. Looking past Armin, he saw Jean laying back to back against him with Marco's arm flung over his stomach. Over on the other side where Mikasa was, Eren saw that Sasha was curled up at Connie's side with her head tucked in the crook of his shoulder while Ymir and Christa were sleeping facing one another with their hands clasped together. Annie was sandwiched in between Bertholdt and Reiner with their arms encircling her in what looked like a protective embrace.

Everyone looked safe, happy even. Sighing softly with a sharp exhale of air, Eren held his right cheek. 'It was just a dream,' he told himself, 'that's all it was.' Silently, he told himself to just go back to bed but he'd by lying if he said he wasn't frightened. What if he saw that man again? Laying back on the floor, he felt Armin and Mikasa shift closer to them, almost as if they unconsciously could feel his tension and wanted to reassure him. He smiled a little at that, sighing once more but ultimately focusing on falling asleep, all the while trying to push away any thoughts of that dark haired man who plagued his dreams.

* * *

Rivaille stood alone on the rooftop above his condo with his hands in his pockets. He was dressed in his usual set of black formal pants, a white collared shirt, and a black tie. Although he had his jacket on, he merely had it draped over his shoulders with the arms free and billowing in the wind alongside his tie. His hair were ruffled by the breezy wind but he paid little to no attention. 'How many times have I seen this?' He wondered to himself as he watched the people and cars zooming and buzzing about in the busy streets below him. He was standing so close to the edge that to an onlooker, he probably looked like a man just before his suicide.

He had never been afraid of heights; Rivaille had stood on the heads of 15 meter titans and had seen enough of the sky to know he wouldn't ever fall. But then again, he had his 3D maneuver gear back then. Distantly, he recalled the memory of fighting alongside Eren in his titan form. The two had been designated partners right from the get-go once Eren had finally learned to control his powers and they worked together in perfect harmony. Rivaille would shout out his commands from his position on the Rogue Titan's shoulders while Eren would carry them out thusly, aiding in battle and always turning the tide of battle in their favor. Things seemed so much simpler then, back when they had both be alive and together…

"Tch," Rivaille grunted. Shaking his head, he pulled out a cigarette and placed it in between his lips before lighting it and taking a deep drag. He reveled in its addictive taste, the tobacco and scent of cloves filling his nose. He had always been a clean person by nature and while it was true that smoking would poison him in the long run both in mind and body, he'd gladly take it over drinking. He didn't do it too often, maybe just a cigarette once every couple of days or so. Rivaille exhaled slowly, closing his eyes so the wind wouldn't blow the smoke into his eyes. He waited a couple minutes before reopening his eyes and as he took another drag of his cigarette, he felt sadness envelop his heart.

He missed how things used to be, he really did. He missed the feeling of the wind blowing through him as he would soar into the skies using his gear. He missed the satisfaction of killing a titan and slicing off the nape of their neck. He missed the adventure that came with scouting beyond the walls. Rivaille missed it all, but the one thing he missed the most, above all else anyway, was Eren. Once upon a time when the world had been beautiful and cruel, they had each other. He promised Eren that he'd love until his very last breath and that he would show him how beautiful their world could be. In fact, the world was beautiful because he had Eren. Rivaille shook slightly as he clutched the fabric of his shirt right over his heart, hating the way that his chest seem to clench. He missed the boy's smile. He missed the boy's laugh. He missed the way Eren would hide his face when they made love. He missed the way his arms felt around Eren's waist and he missed the feeling of Eren's fingers running through his hair when the stress of being Humanity's Strongest proved to be too much for Rivaille to handle.

The dark haired man felt wetness slide down his cheeks as he choked back a soft sob. While it was true that Rivaille appreciated the fact that he had been born with the memories of his former life, it was also true that he found it utterly heartbreaking. All of his memories of Eren were great, they really were. They gave him something to smile about, but that's all they were. It's not like Eren was here with him right now. They weren't together anymore and he wasn't even sure if they would be together again. Was Eren even alive? Did he remember him? Did he remember their love? The worst part about Rivaille's memories was that it left him feeling incredibly lonely – how much longer could he keep doing this?

"You stupid brat. How long do you plan on making me wait?" Shaking his head, he ground the used cigarette bud with his foot before pivoting on his feet. He made his way to the door that led to the roof, wanting to get out of the rain as soon as possible. His clothes stuck to him uncomfortably and it did little to warm his heart. As he made his way back to his room, Rivaille paused outside of it to lean his head against the wooden frame. Clutching the fabric of his shirt again, right where his heart was, he let out a soft whisper, "Where are you, Eren?"

* * *

Author's Notes: Thank you all so much for your reviews, faves, and follows! I hope you all enjoyed the second chapter! :)


	3. Eyes

"Well? Make your proposal already," Rivaille ordered impatiently as he crossed his arms over his chest. Before him stood an older gentleman, one with a very familiar gray mustache, and the author almost let out a dry laugh. 'So you as well, huh?' He mused, raising a thin brow. Like the others, Dot Pixis had also been reborn, but not as a man of the military, no, he was now a cinematic director. During his days as the commander of the Stationary Guard, Pixis had been a very eccentric and effective strategist to which Rivaille had no doubt that these skills were still also present within him.

Despite the professionalism of this meeting, the older man reached into his coat pocket and whipped out a flask of alcohol. He brought it to his lips and sipped it once before letting out a chuckle. "Such abrasiveness." Pixis then took another glorious drink from his silver flask. "Well, it is certainly refreshing to see that you have not changed in the slightest, Corporal Rivaille."

Rivaille's eyes shook and widened in shock before he fiercely turned towards his editors, "Leave!" His voice was harsh, as if it wasn't up for discussion. When Petra slammed her hands on the table and called out to him in protest, he did not falter. It wasn't until Auruo stood up for her that he reiterated himself, "I said leave, dammit!" Cursing under their breaths, Rivaille's editors reluctantly did as they were told but not without Gunter slamming the door shut behind him. Satisfied that they were finally alone, the author leaned back in his chair. "Explain."

"I've no words," Pixis replied back simply, "It happened over the course of my lifetime." When Rivaille opened his mouth, the director cleared his throat. "That is for another time. I am here to discuss with you my plans." The former Survey Corps member tensed briefly, not at all happy with being denied. Rivaille however nodded slowly, indicating that he would let the subject pass for now.

"What is your proposal?" He questioned once more.

"I wish to tell our story -" The director answered evenly.

"I've been telling our story," Rivaille quickly cut in. "Stop wasting my time, Pixis. State your proposal already."

Throwing his head back, the former commander let out a bark of laughter. Reaching down to his briefcase, he pulled out a folder and flipped through a series of papers before ultimately laying them out for Rivaille to see. Watching the younger man's eyes sweep back and forth rapidly, Pixis confirmed the question at the tip of Rivaille's tongue, "These are the designs for the prototype 3D Maneuver Gear that my engineers will design on behalf of the live-action rendition if it gets approved. We will test them and work with them till they are complete. It is my hope that they will operate exactly as they did for us in the past."

Rivaille's fingers clenched over the various papers of Pixis' design plans and without a second thought, he nodded swiftly, "I'll approval of your proposal but only on one condition."

A pair of amber colored eyes seemed to twinkle mischievously at that, "Oh? And what is it?"

"I will be the one to test the prototypes."

Their eyes met and after a few seconds, a silent agreement was made between them. Pixis and Rivaille were the sole surviving individuals with the memories of their past; they both knew of the titans and they both knew of humanity's desire for freedom. It was up to them to tell their story so others could learn of their sacrifice. And as they both rose into a standing position, they both touched a right fist to their hearts, saluting each other. It was the truest offer that they could have done in this lifetime.

* * *

With a dazed look on his face, Eren mentally let out a bored sigh. Cupping his chin in his hand, his turquoise eyes darted to the left and read the clock hanging on the wall. 'Still another twenty minutes to go,' He thought. It was a Monday and a very dull Monday at that. The teenager glanced around at his fellow classmates, noticing how some were avidly paying attention like Armin, Mikasa, and Bertholdt while some weren't. Like him, Reiner was fighting the urge to fall asleep whereas Sasha and Connie were up to their old tricks again and goofing off. By some divine nature, all twelve of them had Literature together and were spread out evenly around the classroom. He himself was situated by Connie and Sasha while Mikasa was over with Reiner, Marco, and Jean. Armin sat together with Ymir, Christa, and Bertholdt on the west side of the classroom. Naturally, Reiner, Marco, and Bertholdt were situated in the last of their rows due to their immense height. Turning his attention to what his teacher was currently saying, Eren was able to pick up the last of his lecture.

"… and so, we will now begin our unit on symbolism." And as if on cue, the class was quick to groan or sigh in response. The fact that it was Monday was really taking its toll on everyone, no one wanted to be here. Their teacher however did not let that slide for she cleared her throat dangerously and crossed her arms. "It's either that or a pop quiz on something you haven't learned yet." Not wanting that, Eren and the rest of his class sat up straight. "That's what I thought," she said smugly. Unfolding her arms, she picked up the pile of papers on her desk and immediately began passing them out to the first person in each row. As her students took one for themselves and sent more copies back, she picked up her own copy but in the form of a novel. "I thought it would be a good idea to study something of modern literature," she began, "We will be covering several excerpts from the novel, Attack on Titan by Levi. Has anyone read it before?"

The class was silent before Mikasa raised her hand slowly, her face as passive as ever. "Only a few chapters, ma'am."

The teacher hummed that she understood before walking around the room slowly, her forefinger and thumb on the upper right hand corner of whatever page she was on. Clearing her throat once more, she tapped on Eren's desk with her free hand, "Eren, could you please start us off by reading the first paragraph on your sheet?"

"Yes ma'am!" He replied back, before looking down at the paper. Standing up, he held it in his hand, his eyes reading from left to right, "'I died for naught' – I won't let it end like that for you, not until I am the last one standing. The enemy is cruel so we will kill them all. The enemy is colossal so we will jump. In our hands, we hold the blades of glory and sing in the name of victory. We bear the wings of freedom upon our backs – the hope of mankind. Swearing iron determination upon our hearts, we slash open the circle of idiocy. We will soar into the skies with our wings of freedom, uncaged and free.'" Having reached the end of the paragraph, Eren paused, a sudden heaviness overcoming him. 'What is this?' He thought to himself, practically hearing the distinct sound of his heart beating furiously in his chest. He felt restless, alive even. It was strange, but oddly enough, it felt somewhat familiar? Subconsciously, he clenched his right hand till it formed into a fist, practically crumpling the paper in doing so.

"Eren Jaeger!"

Snapping back to reality, the brunet swiftly turned towards his teacher who was looking at him with stern eyes. He shifted uncomfortably and blinked, "Sorry, I spaced out for a bit." When he asked her what she wanted, she replied that she wanted him to analyze what he had just read. Sitting back down in his chair, Eren rubbed his thumb over the edges of his birthmark, a habit that he had developed during times of stress and discomfort. Refocusing his attention on the reading excerpt before him, he skimmed it once more before looking up to meet her eyes. "In my opinion, there is a lot of motivation and desire for freedom. It states that even though the enemy is 'cruel' and 'colossal', they will still fight. Their response to it is that they'll jump despite how big it is, like they'll do anything to be free."

Humming softly once again, she nodded slowly, liking his answer. Her voice was soft as she spoke, "And why do you think they want to be free so badly?" She knew he hadn't truly read the book but she was intrigued as to what he would say.

Eren didn't even miss a beat, "Humanity should not be confined to a cage." He then found himself clutching the fabric over his heart as if he was speaking straight from the heart himself. The words felt foreign to him yet they flowed off his tongue naturally as if he had said those very same words hundreds and hundreds of times. Letting out the breath he didn't know he had been keeping, the brunet finished softly, more to himself than anyone else, "We aren't cattle, why should we act like it?"

"Good answer," The teacher approved with a nod of her own. Moving over to the other side of the room where Christa and the rest were, she began her search for a new student to call. Satisfied that he had been able to give a good enough answer, Eren let out a relieved sigh. Allowing his head to drop to the desk, he rested his chin upon folded arms, listening to Ymir's analysis in the distance.

'Where did that come from?' Eren asked himself. 'It was almost as if I was speaking from experience.' Sighing to himself, he took another glance at the clock. It wasn't much longer now that school would be over and he would be able to go home. Oh well, another day at school over and done with, soon enough anyway.

Once the bell rung and everyone shuffled about, Eren waved goodbye to his friends and made his way out of the school. Adjusting the strap of his schoolbag, Eren let out a series of hums as he hummed along to the song pounding in his ear-bud. He usually kept one in his right ear while the other one was free, that way, he could still be alert if need be. He was walking home at the moment but this time, he was doing so alone. Armin and Mikasa both had after school obligations to go to; he did tutoring for underclassmen while she had martial arts with Annie. Eren also participated in martial arts with Reiner but the boys met on Tuesdays and Thursdays. As he walked, he glanced at the time on his phone and hummed, "It's only 2:10." He had another two hours before Mikasa would be home and while it was true that they did not live far from their high school, he honestly contemplated walking extra slowly just to make the time pass. Their house was located in the district of Shiganshina with Armin's house being not too far away. 'I wonder what's for dinner today,' he mused, watching as cars zoomed by in the street. He reached the intersection and fell in with the large group of people that were also waiting to cross. Leaning back and forth on his heels, Eren too waited for the signal to cross. 'I hope it's something good.'

When the light flashed, everyone immediately began moving in direction of the opposite street and he was quick to make a move of his own. He walked at an even pace, his head still bobbing a bit at the music in his ears. His turquoise eyes looked ahead, never once straying. He tapped his thumb against the strap of his schoolbag to the beat of the song. All around him, he could hear conversations. Some were about plans for the day, some work-related issues, something about lunch plans – Gasping sharply, Eren felt a very foreign and unfamiliar feeling within his chest. It was painful yet reassuring at the same time but it was quickly beginning to spread throughout his whole body. He felt something wet on his face and instinctively looked up at the sky. 'It's not raining…?' The teen touched a finger to his face and once he felt that very same wetness slide down his cheek, he brought his finger back to look at the tip of his damp finger. "…Why?"

* * *

"Rivaille!" Hanji screamed out, dragging out the last syllable. Extending her hands upwards, she began waving it wildly in her attempts to get her old friend to notice her. Beside her, Erwin and Mike were conversing softly and laughing at her charmingly. She had always been such a passionate person, ever since they met her eight years ago at university. "Rivaille, Rivaille, Rivaille!"

His first reaction was to growl in irritation, "I heard you the first time, Shitty Glasses!" After loosening his tie a little so it wasn't so tight around his neck, he shoved his hands in his pockets and nodded at Erwin and Mike. Due to his many hours at the office, Rivaille hadn't seen any of his friends in quite a long time. Erwin himself was usually very busy with managing his company but he luckily had Mike, his vice president, to help him along the way. Hanji usually was a busy woman but she always managed to make time to arrange a get-together for them all. Rivaille would be lying if he said he wasn't happy that the three of them were just as they were many years ago. "So what did you all call me out here for?" He glanced at the time on his cell phone and saw that it was a little after 2 o'clock. The brunette grinned and attached herself to Erwin and Mike's arms, grinning like she always did.

"We're going out to lunch!" She announced.

"We're going out to lunch," He repeated.

"We're going out to lunch!" Hanji was smiling now, her brows raised in a teasing manner.

Rivaille blinked once, twice, and then a third time before rolling his eyes and pivoting on his heels. Whirling around quickly, he was able to walk a couple of steps before he felt Hanji throw her arms around his right arm, now attaching herself to him. 'You haven't changed either,' He thought somewhat affectionately as a small almost unnoticeable smile laced his lips. He had always been a clean person by nature and valued his personal space but she was one of the few people he allowed to get so close. With fake reluctance, he allowed her to pull him along till he was walking in the middle of the former squad leaders. They walked along the streets in central Maria due to Hanji, Erwin, and Mike's line of work being located there. They chatted about, or rather, Erwin and Hanji chatted and the others just listened silently. Rivaille laughed when appropriate but their conversation was the furthest thing from his mind for he was still repaying the events of his meeting with Pixis in his mind. 'The Commander was able to remember everything we went through but unlike me, he wasn't born with his memories. He said it happened over the course of his lifetime so does that mean…?' Looking at his friends from the corner of his eyes, he tensed slightly in wonder, 'Will they also remember in due time?' And building off from that, would his editors gain their memories back as well? And perhaps, maybe even Eren if he gets reborn? Rivaille really hoped so. As they neared the busy intersection, he waited with the rest of his friends to cross the street, noticing how there seemed to be a horde of people on the other side. But then again, it was lunchtime.

Once the signal flashed positive, he fell in with the rest of the crowd with Hanji, Erwin, and Mike flanking him on both sides. He was only able to walk a few steps before he stopped dead in his tracks, that familiar feeling of heartache striking him painfully. He clutched at the fabric of his clothes, his fingers fisting it harshly. 'What is it this?' Rivaille asked himself, letting out small pants of air. His eyes burned as he felt tears pricking at the corner of his eyes. Darting his eyes left and right, the author began searching for something. He didn't know exactly what that something was but goddammit, something was here. He saw that Erwin, Hanji, and Mike were still laughing about whatever they were talking about, seemingly oblivious to their longtime friend who was currently undergoing some sort of stress. 'Where? Where is it coming from?' Rivaille shifted his gaze to the right and saw a flash of shockingly familiar turquoise eyes but he was crying after all, maybe he really wasn't truly seeing them? Still, he took a step towards those eyes, his own pair of steely blues widening at the thought, the possibility that it could be him. Rivaille couldn't make out the face or the overall body structure but he was able to see that the person in question was taller than him, not significantly by much, but above average height. 'Wait.' He thought helplessly, hating how he couldn't see straight. Goddammit! Why were there so many people out!? 'Wait!' He called out once more. He was barely able to reach his hand out when he felt someone pull on his arm. Whirling around sharply to glare at whoever it was that touched him, he saw that it was Erwin who was watching him perplexingly.

"Rivaille, don't fall behind," Erwin warned, shaking his head a little as he hurried to pull Rivaille along.

"If you know what's good for you, you'll let go!" Rivaille retorted back venomously as he quickly looked for those mysteriously colored eyes. Despite how much he looked, he couldn't see them anymore, the crowd having shoved them further and further apart. He felt that horrible feeling of sadness and heartache once again before letting out a pained growl. 'What's the fucking point?' He more so inaudibly stated than questioned. Shaking his head, he turned his attention back to Erwin and took another step forward when he heard a voice that turned his throat so dry that he didn't think any amount of water could quench it ever again.

"…Why?"

His eyes grew wide and his breathing stilled if only for a second. 'That voice…That voice! Eren!' Shoving Erwin away from him roughly, he made another attempt to look over his shoulder, desperately searching for the source of that painfully familiar voice. 'It has to be him!' He pleaded and pleaded, willing to throw away all his pride just for the chance to see those eyes one last time. He didn't care if he was getting looks, he didn't care if people were whispering about him. Rivaille had to see him. He had been alone without Eren all his life, he wasn't about to let the boy slip away if there was any chance of finding him in this life. He was panting hard and was clenching his fists, where was he? Where was Eren? Rivaille was about to take another step towards the direction he last saw the figure when a loud car horn thundered from his right side. Turning his face slightly, he saw that a driver was angrily honking for him to get out of the way. In the background, he could hear Hanji and Erwin shouting for him to a move on. 'I lost him,' Rivaille thought somewhat brokenly. 'Not again. I can't believe I lost him again!' Clenching his fists, he growled irritably and sent a powerful glare at the driver who dared to honk at him again, effectively causing the person behind the wheel to cease his hand on the steering wheel. Stomping over to where his friends were, Rivaille ignored their attempts to get his attention, all the more concerned with those unforgettable eyes that he had just seen. 'Eren is alive,' he thought after a few seconds. 'And he's here in Maria.'

* * *

**"No one blames you," Eren found himself saying as he looked down at the dark mass of hair below him. He was standing, that much he was certain, and for some reason, there was another man in his presence. He was facing away from him and was currently sitting in a wooden chair with his head in his hands. Eren's eyes watched as the other man's shoulders tensed slightly at his words and he responded in kind by wrapping his arms around the other's neck. 'What am I doing?' Eren thought, wondering why on earth his body was moving without his consent. Was this a dream? What was going on? The brunet leaned forward and ghosted his lips over the shell of the other man's ears, his voice soft, "Corporal, it's not your fault."**

**"Hanji and Erwin are badly wounded. Mike is dead." This 'Corporal' person replied back slowly, this voice ridden with the pain of his actions. Biting his lower lip, Eren tightened his embrace, not so much that it would hurt the other man of course, but just enough to let the other know that he was here. 'What am I doing!?' Eren practically screamed in his head. It was like he wasn't at all in control of his own actions. All he could do was watch as a version of him moved without his consent. Who was this man? Who was he to this man? What the hell was going on!? "I couldn't do anything but stay within the walls while you were all out." **

**"Corporal..." Eren called out softly. He felt the person before him shift slightly and that's when he saw it, those undenniably familiar set of blue eyes that he had seen not more than two days ago. Those very same eyes that looked at him with discipline and authority. Those very same eyes that belonged to the man who plagued his dreams. Despite how much he wanted to, Eren couldn't get away. He wasn't in control of his own body for fuck's sake! All he could do was watch as the man enveloped him in his own embrace. He wanted to get away. Why the hell was he doing these kinds of things with a person who beat him to a bloody pulp? Why the hell would he want to be with someone who reduced him to nothing? Despite all that, the brunet could not deny the overwhemling sense of comfort he felt in response to the Coporal's actions. He couldn't ignore the feeling of affection and pride that enveloped his heart at having been held by such strong arms. 'Whose feelings are these? Mine?'**

"...!" Eren let out a gasp just as he had done that night over at Christa's. Panting slightly, he looked around his room, trying to find something, anything of normalcy. When he saw his usual set of things, he visibly relaxed but not before growling under his breath. 'Why does that man keep popping in my dreams!?' He thought furiously, his eyes slitting slightly. He couldn't even begin to explain what he saw. He wasn't even sure he wanted to explain. All Eren knew was that he was having very strange dreams all of a sudden and it did not sit well with him at all. 'The first time I saw him, he hurt me but this time, he held me.' Cursing himself to oblivion, he rolled over onto his side, holding his head in his hands. 'What does this all mean? Why am I seeing him in my dreams?' There had to be a source to all this, a reason why he kept seeing him. The brown haired boy thought back to the events of his day from the time he woke up to the time he fell asleep. The day had progressed as it normally did - he woke up, took care of his personal hygiene, went to school, walked home, did homework, and went to bed. What did he do during that time to cause such a mess in his own head? Replaying the events once again, he suddenly was struck by a bolt of realization. 'I cried today for some reason.' He couldn't begin to explain why he cried, he literally had no words. When it happened, he was just so overwhelmed by emotions that his body just reacted on its own. 'It was just like in my dream...!' He thought. 'I had no control over my body's movements either!' Voicing the very same thoughts from his earlier dream, Eren tensed uncomfortably. 'Whose feelings are these? They can't be mine, can they?' As he thought it over in his head, he found himself slipping away, back in to the world of sleep and dreams. '... I don't want to see him again,' he thought once more.

* * *

Author's Notes: Thank you for all your wonderful reviews, faves, and follows! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I will see you next time with the next one!


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